Home Inspection

Yesterday evening, after work, we had our required home inspection of the house we're in the process of buying. Things went pretty well overall, nothing major needs to be repaired anyway, and so we can now go ahead with a little bit less stress. The majority of repairs were very small and low cost, but the inspector did suggest we have the roof shingles replaced. Luckily this is not terribly expensive, and the realtor assured us that the seller would want to do that in order to sell the house to any buyer, so odds are these requests will be agreed to. I certainly hope so!

It was so exciting to pull up to the new house and see the "SOLD" sign nailed across the realtor's sign! Everything is happening so fast that sometimes my head starts to spin a little bit. I would guess we are about 1/2 way to finishing this process in terms of steps taken, but we still have to wait 52 days before we get the keys... torture!!!!

We've been so busy getting our mortgage information together and making and keeping appointments that we've hardly had time to keep up with our normal routines. For months we were really good about eating right everyday (minus the cheating days everyone is entitled to every week or so) and exercising multiple times per week, for at least an hour. Plus we tend to keep the apartment pretty clean simply because it's so tiny that there's hardly a choice. The past two weeks have been such a whirlwind that we've barely exercised (I've ridden my bike to or from work a few times, that's it!) and often eaten badly. The past 24 hours are particularly telling for me: yesterday I had half a shortbread cookie with frosting before noon and A LOT of pizza for dinner. This morning I had a healthy breakfast followed by a slice of my co-worker's chocolate birthday cake. Now you all know that I can't say no to chocolate, so I'm not going to try to say it was just a moment of weakness. I actually think that consuming chocolate is a near-religious experience for me, but I digress.

We, especially I, have GOT to get on the ball. Tonight we have plans to clean and do laundry and hopefully fit in a bike ride and cook at home. This weekend we're meeting friends for drinks on Friday and meeting other friends for a long hike on Saturday. That should be a great way to jump-start a healthy week next week.

Next up: repairs and the appraisal, then HOPEFULLY getting full approval from the mortgage company without too much extra work....

Leigh's 30th Birthday Weekend

Much to my joy, and Leigh's chagrine, Leigh turned 30 on Saturday. Why am I so pleased about this? For some reason I've always thought one's 30s are their best years. You're still young and energetic, often unburdened with too many responsibilities, often breaking into your career, but finally getting past a lot of the growing pains that come with the teenage, college, and post-college years. I'm only 26, and I'm not wishing my 20s away or anything, but I'm really glad that Leigh is embarking on her 30s so that we can really start enjoying adulthood.

Leigh requested that we have a low-key birthday. I ordered her a few presents from Amazon, but a little late so they didn't come in the mail on time :-(, so I bought her a house instead! Just kidding, sort of... I mean, I have done all of the research and such in securing the mortgage but if gift giving requires the spending of one's own money then no, this is not a birthday gift. If gift giving only requires effort, then yes, it is! Aside from gifts, Leigh requested food and activities. For the food we went to the Double Musky Inn in Girdwood. I've heard great things about this little restaurant and it did not disappoint. The prices seem high until your food comes. Then the mere volume and quality of what is on your plate more than makes up for the price tag. Leigh had so much leftover steak that we made dinner out of it on Sunday night (steak fajitas!!!). Dessert was fantastic too. Next time I'll have to get the coconut salmon appetizer and the peanut butter pie.

After dinner we visited the Alaska Wildlife Conservation Center in Portage. We bought a year pass and it did not disappoint either. The center has a variety of local animals, often being nursed back to health or given a permanent home at the center because they were orphaned at a young age. The bears were particularly exciting to see up close, without fear of becoming their supper.

Me with a bison.

Leigh with a black bear.

During our outting, Leigh fielded calls from friends and family wishing her a happy birthday. After hanging out with the wildlife, we headed back to Anchorage and spent the evening relaxing and talking about the house we're in the process of buying. In all a nice, low-key birthday as requested by the birthday girl herself. We are talking about extending the fun and going to Seward next weekend since we've had such beautiful weather, but then we might have house stuff to take care of at that time... we'll see...

Most of the weekend was spent daydreaming and making plans, even window shopping for paint, appliances, and closet doors. Our inspection is tomorrow evening and hopefully the house will get a clean bill of health. Then we have to get it appraised and the mortgage finalized. Hopefully everything will continue to go smoothly so we can start making this place our new home starting in mid-July!

Tough Times Turn Wonderful

It's amazing that only a week ago I was blogging about some pretty heavy issues weighing on my mind. While those issues have yet to be resolved, namely my health concerns, making positive progress is certainly in the works. Then the most amazing thing happened, we bought a house, and now everything is looking just a little brighter. I think this just goes to show that sometimes a person just needs a little bit of joy to make all other worries a bit lighter.

It also shows how miserable our current rental has made us since we moved here last August! It may seem silly, especially to people who have always been pretty comfortable in their homes, but your surroundings and your home really do have a huge impact on your quality of life. Leigh and I have always prided ourselves on being very low-maintenance in terms of housing needs. We don't require a lot of space or a lot of upgrades. In fact, when we were in France we shared a two bedroom, one bath apartment with two roommates. It was a very nice apartment, but limited on space and privacy and we made it work because we were so happy in all other aspects of our lives... I mean, we were in Europe for goodness sake! But our current apartment has certainly tested our limits. Happily, we can literally count the days until we're done living here and done with renting for the forseeable future!

Even aside from house excitement, this week has been pretty wonderful. I've had my office to myself, which has been so quiet and stress-free, my apartment has stayed pretty clean, the weather has been lovely, I rode my bike to work today for "Ride Your Bike to Work Day," and Leigh's birthday is tomorrow! Celebrating birthdays is fun in our house because one of us gets spoiled and the other gets to enjoy the spoiling. In addition. we always do something fun together and enjoy one or two indulgent meals. Leigh's 30th is no different: we're heading out of town for the day, probably stopping for breakfast at a bakery I've heard of in Girdwood, then doubling back to Girdwood after our "road trip" to have dinner at the famous Double Musky restaurant(assuming we can get a table!). It will be so much fun and we have so much to celebrate!

Impulse Buys

I'm a planner. Leigh is a budgeter. This works extremely well for us and most of our decisions are a long time coming, having given them a lot of thought and strategically placing the culmination of these decisions on our calendars. It's nice to dream about what you want to do and to achieve and then enjoy the process of making those dreams come true.

But sometimes your dreams seem a little too far off, so you don't plan for them, until they come true right before your eyes. That's when it's fun to live life on impulse and just go for it, especially if you know you can handle the aftermath of the impulse. The best examples from our lives together have to do with moving to new cities: the summer we ran away to Seattle, moving to Buffalo sight-unseen so I could go to an affordable and respected law school, buying my Yaris on a whim, taking a job in France and arranging for Leigh to spend 3 months with me, moving to Alaska to start over. These are some of the best decisions we've ever made and most of them were done in a heartbeat. These decisions changed our lives.

That's what happened this week. On Saturday I saw a cute little house listed for sale. I wasn't looking to buy, I just like to browse at real estate from time to time to get an idea of our options in the area. The house was listed for $185,000. It has 2 bedrooms, 1040 square feet, and it's recently updated. Similar homes often sell for $200-215,000 and are not so updated. We decided to take a look at it, just to look, and to see if we can get pre-approved for a mortgage, just to find out. We were prepared to just look and walk away knowing we didn't have a down payment. I called our mortgage company, we called our parents, we asked a few favors. Next thing we know our families have promised to advance us the down payment and the mortgage terms were very reasonable.

So today we bought the house! We made and offer, it was countered, and we agreed on a price and terms everyone was happy with. It happened so fast and we are completely in love with this house. Allow me to take you on a brief tour:

This is our house. It's "semi-attached" meaning we share a wall with the neighbor but it's not a condo or part of an HOA. We have a front driveway and the previous owner installed a side driveway for RVs or toys, complete with hookups for electric, etc. The house is located less than 1 mile from two different parks, one of which is on the Tony Knowles Coastal Trail and the bike route to work.
This is the entry way into the split-level area, with the living room on the right. It's bigger than our current living room and has beautiful finishings.
Leigh goes gaga every time she looks at the kitchen. It's also recently renovated, the counters are tall, and it has a window looking to the backyard.
The BEST part is the backyard. It's HUGE for such a small house and it already has garden and flower plots, a greenhouse and a storage shed. This was the biggest selling point for us. We can already imagine our Juneau Cat playing outside, us planting vegetables and flowers and grilling on the back porch. If all goes well and there are no hiccups, we will close in mid-July and move in slowly since our lease isn't complete until the end of August. Our square footage will double and we'll be so close to work and our favorite neighborhoods!

Today a dream came true for us. We found a home that is clean, comfortable, affordable and has all the extras we were hoping for. The best part is that we own this, so every payment made goes toward building equity rather than lining the pockets of an apathetic landlord. So exciting!!!

So here's to diving in head-first!

Re-evaluating Summer

Last post I mentioned some upcoming medical tests and appointments I'll be going through starting in July. So far I have nothing specific to worry about, but being so young this information is a bit consuming for me, and for Leigh. It may seem silly, but I went to the doctor knowing something was up, but I honestly did not expect to need to see a specialist or undergo any long-term treatments. Needless to say this news has thrown a wrench in my/our summer plans a bit. Initially, and I'm sure I've blogged about this enough, I was planning to use the summer to really challenge myself physically so I could complete a 200k bike ride in September. This would also mark the joyous occassion of my getting a new bicycle. I'd already picked out my new bike (see below: Jamis Bosanova) and Leigh had added the cost into our monthly budget. Projected order date was the first week of June. I was stoked. Then I got my first $800 medical bill and calculated that next fiscal year my medical bills would likely max out my insurance, costing me about $1250 out of pocket plus an extra $100 per month off my paycheck in premiums. In the big scheme of things this is not a huge amount of money and we can afford it, but being a frugal person with dreams of home ownership, debt-free living, and retirement, I felt it my duty to put off the purchase of my new bicycle in lieu of other things. First and foremost, I have to pay my medical costs and pay off my credit card this year. Secondly, Leigh and I are in desperate need of a new mattress and could really use a new car (my Yaris' abilities are maxed out by Alaskan winters). On top of this we are hoping to move apartments in September or October and, at the end of the day, our primary goal is to build up our savings to buy a house within the next year or two.

Leigh has been a champ about keeping us on a reasonable budget and making sure the bills are paid on time and money goes into savings each month, and she was calculating a way for me to get all these tests done and still get my bicycle, but I decided enough was enough. I can't place this financial burden on us and still demand my expensive new toy. Besides, after learning the results of my bloodwork I decided to forego my long distance rides this summer so I don't put too much strain on my system. Without any randonnees to ride, there's no point in investing in a rando bike this year anyway, right?

I've also had to re-evaluate my weight loss and fitness goals. I've been steadily gaining weight for about a month and a half now. At first I just thought it was post-vacation weight, but now I'm pretty sure my body is revolting against me in a way that is connected with my crazy bloodwork results and a possible metabolic disorder. Since this appears to be out of my hands until I get more answers, I can't set any real weight loss goals without the gaurantee of becoming very frustrated. Instead I've decided to be stricter about eating clean, keep track of my calories, fat, sugars, and cholesterol (for medical purposes), and get 45 mins to an hour of exercise most days. The goal is to have healthy behavoir so that my next round of tests will use a reasonable, healthy lifestyle as the baseline instead of coming off a chocolate bender or something else that could skew the results and deter the doc from finding the root cause of my issues.

Knowing how disappointed I am about putting my summer goals on the backburner, Leigh said we should rechannel our summer plans into weekend trips. She's so smart, and knows me so well! Luckily I've recently come up with a few fun ideas that we can do in a day or an overnight throughout the summer. Additionally, I'm not completely unable to do active things this summer, I just want to be more mindful of the amount of strain I put on my body.

Our first trip is this Saturday and I'm sooo excited! The best part is that we have two options and won't decide until we get up Saturday morning- if it's rainy we'll drive 3 hours to Seward to the Sealife Center. If it's sunny we'll drive 1 hour to Portage to the Wildlife Center. Either way we'll wind up in Girdwood for dinner at the Double Muskee, all in celebration of Leigh's 30th birthday!!! Yay!!! Plus it's going to feel great to get out of town for the day. In the coming months I'm hoping to do some overnights, maybe Kenai, or Homer, or Denali. We'll see...

Shit-tastic Day Becomes Tough Week

I touched on some topics last blog post about tough times in friendships, "local travel" woes (i.e. driving long distance for work stuff), money and health concerns. Well, all of these have just continued to evolve this week. This time another friend invited and then un-invited me to visit. Yet again, this happened due to the presence of a boyfriend. OK, I don't want to come across as being a man-hater or being jealous of my friends' boyfriends. That's not it at all. I just want my friends to use a little foresight when making plans with me so that I'm not always feeling ditched or replaced.

As for travel, well like I said I was making plans to go out of town for a long weekend but that was cancelled almost as soon as it started. Instead Leigh and I are planning some brief driving trips this summer to see something new every so often. First is Leigh's birthday next week. We haven't decided exactly what we're doing yet, but it will either be a trip to Girdwood and Portage to see some wildlife or a drive all the way to Seward to the Sealife Center. Either one will be a blast! We are also talking about going up to Denali sometime this summer, but we haven't hashed out the details. In the Fall we're going to Hope for the weekend, which I've heard is a really fun time with great hiking and scenery.

Money and health seem to be going hand-in-hand these days. Last Monday I made an appointment for my annual visit. Tuesday this week I went in, had all the usual stuff done, and stated my concerns regarding my inability to control my weight through diet and exercise among some other issues. The doc took blood and ran tests. The next day I learned that my cholesterol is through the roof and my triglycerides are so high I'm amazed I'm able to function. Some other numbers came back elevated too, including my insulin and thyroid, but the doc assured me that I'm not diabetic and I don't have PCOS, which I was actually assuming it was one or the other. Instead they're saying it's a metabolic disorder of some fashion and I've made an appointment to see a specialist.... in JULY! I can't believe I have to walk around for 2 months knowing I have sludge flowing through my veins.

So scary, and it's hard to concentrate on my daily life now. I don't know if I should change how I eat (which is actually very healthy), exercise less vigorously (to avoid a cardiac problem??), or anything else. Logic tells me that with my healthy diet and non-sedentary lifestyle that any dietary or behavoiral changes won't affect my numbers enough to make a difference, so I should just go about my business so the specialist gets an accurrate reading of my body's operating levels. But the scared shitless part of me wants someone to dip net in my veins to get all the triglycerides out and then go vegan immediately.

As for money woes, well these tests have already cost me $800 and I learned today that my benefits year renews on July 1, BEFORE my next doctor's visit. So I have to meet my deductible AGAIN before reaching my annual maximum. That's another $500 out of my pocket due purely to bad timing. If I need surgery I'll have to make sure my benefits will cover that at all. So Leigh says I need to up my coverage during the open enrollment period because, obviously, whatever is going on with me is going to get expensive and it's going to get there fast.

Since I've gone ahead and made it public knowledge that something is awry with my health, I promise to keep this blog updated for the 1 or 2 people who stumble upon it from time to time. I don't mean to alarm anyone, especially as it's too soon to know exactly what's going on or how serious it is. For now I'm just nervous. As a 26 year old, I've never actually been ill or felt less than fortunate to have good health. Now I know I've been walking around with some serious issues, possibly for years, and that is unsettling at best. The good news is that in those years I've swam on a collegiate team, survived the stress of law school, walked/hiked around Europe, eaten heavy French food, hiked in Oahu, and ridden my bike around Anchorage without episode. Odds are I can continue along my regular business of eating healthy food and exercising a few times per week without keeling over and, when I get some answers, I can then decide how to proceed to live a long, healthy life.

Kind of a Shit-tastic Day

Last week I attended the Bar Convention in Fairbanks. I'd been looking forward to it for a while, especially the part about missing 3 days of work without having to use paid time off. Well, things got off to a rocky start when I had an unannounced addition to the drive North, which was supposed to have been just my friend. Then it was my friend and her boyfriend. If you know me at all, you know I hate surprises and I REALLY hate it when people are late. To top it all off, Boyfriend decided he was going to drive MY car the whole way. Being the non-confrontational person that I am, I tried to see the positive side of this (I didn't have to drive and could just relax) and hopped in the backseat of MY car and just kept my mouth shut. Unfortunately, I was the only one with my mouth shut and had to endure 300+ miles of chatter from Boyfriend about inane topics. Glad he's not my boyfriend.

The rest of the week was a lot of fun. I hung out with colleagues, met new people, ate free food and drank free coffee and booze. Good times. The ride back was more tolerable, mostly because I drove most of the way and made Boyfriend sit in the backseat the whole time. This might be the last time anyone ever pulls a stunt like this on me because I'm still pissed about it 5 days later... Anyway, I'm glad I went and even more glad to be back. I missed my Leigh and my Juneau Cat.

Over the weekend I did a 22 mile ride to prepare for my upcoming 100k. It was a tough 22 miles, so now I'm starting to worry about my endurance and whether the 100k is feasible. What's more important is whether the 200k in September is feasible! So I need to fit more riding in, no matter how much my legs and my bum beg me to sit on the couch and eat Nutella.

Yesterday was kind of a down day, just trying to get back into the swing of things. Yesterday evening really sucked because (1) I had to get my haircut, which is always a little stressful and (2) I had to attend a work function with Leigh, which was anything but fun, and (3) I found the most perfect house to make a home only to realize that I won't be able to buy anything for at least 2 years. I've been generally feeling down lately for no reason and every reason, just like in the past when I've been down for a while but could never point to one thing to change and make things all better. Leigh is pretty tired of putting up with my pouty face too. I can't blame her though because I'm not the most understanding when she's feeling down.

To top it all off, my clothes haven't been fitting very well lately. Either I'm squeazing into things or hanging over my waistbands or my tummy is pooching out through my shirt. For a year I've been careful about my eating and getting tons of exercise. For 5 months I've been "eating-clean" by abstaining almost completely from refined sugar and processed foods (minus the week in Hawai'i). To think that only a few months ago I was feeling strong and fit! Then the ski season ended and I went on vacation. It seems like 2-3 weeks of less-than-vigilant eating and less-than-intense exercise (though I did get tons of exercise on vacation) will cause me to regain any weight I may have painstakingly lost over the course of the past 6 months. In fact, as of today, I've gained a full 10 pounds since coming home from France. Please keep in mind that in France I ate chocolate, Nutella, pastries, cheese, white bread and drank wine every single day. Also, the only exercise I got was walking around cities and running after trains. Yet now that I'm home, playing sports and watching my food intake carefully I am getting fatter. Weird, right?

So I went to the doctor today for an annual exam plus some testing. The doc took about 7 vials of blood and is going to run a full panel of hormones and such to see what's going on with me. The end result? $800 in medical expenses! I met my $500 deductible and then had to pay 30% after that. Upon hearing this I grumbled, "I dont' really see the point in having insurance most of the time." To which the receptionist said, "Without insurance your bill would be $1,818!" So is it that my insurance sucks or that medical care is highly overpriced? I say both.

Anyway, now I just have to see if that $800 will buy me any answers to my concerns and, hopefully, lead to some solutions to my problems. I'd love to find out that my hormones are a little off-balance and, with some tweaking, I'll finally have control over my weight and overall health. I enjoy eating healthy and exercising, but I do not enjoy struggling to fit my body, sore from exercise, into jeans that would easily fit a girl who eats icecream and drinks soda on a regular basis. It just doesn't seem fair!

To add up the score that's Life is Unfair: 10, Emily: 0. Right now I'm feeling used and unappreciated by friends, confused about some upcoming life decisions, shocked by the expense of staying healthy, and totally screwed over by genetics to the point that I hate the skin I live in. So I'm feeling pretty shit-tastic about myself and my day right now.

Springtime Frustrations

The past few weeks have been pretty frustrating for me. I feel like I am in the midst of experiencing a real set-back in many areas of my life. For some reason, right around the time I got back from vacation, a bunch of shit hit the fan one day after another and I'm simply not dealing with any of the repercussions very well. For example:

Work:

Right before I went on vacation I was pretty burnt out on life. Apparently this was reflected in my work. Last week not less than three memos and orders came back across my desk needing corrections. This does not make me happy. I take a lot of pride in producing high quality work on behalf of my judges, so having work come back with corrections is a big deal to me because I should have caught those mistakes before submitting my work. My judges didn't reprimand me, probably because they know this is not typical for my work product, but the experience left me feeling sloppy and useless.

Networking:

For a long time I thought I was good at this. I'd chat people up, ask intelligent questions, then politely ask to stay in touch. Then recently I've had opportunities to briefly meet some professionals in Anchorage and in those situations I've made a lot of mistakes or just failed to communicate well. I'm really worried about getting a reputation for cornering people and asking them stupid questions or just generally being annoying to people I might work with one day. What is wrong with me? Has a year in Alaska turned me into a hopelessly unsocial person? Yikes!

Home:

Things are pretty good at home, but we're hunting for a new apartment and unsure of what route to take. We can either get a really comfortable place, possibly our own house, and save a little every month toward buying or we can get a smaller place, maybe another apartment in a building or a condo, and save more every month toward buying a house. Both ideas are tempting and both have negatives. The real frustration is the "no pets" rule most landlords in Anchorage have. Pet owners really have a tough time finding a place to live that isn't an over-priced shit hole. We'll just have to keep looking throughout the summer and hope to find a good deal.

Fitness:

This is a huge problem for me right now. My vacation led to a lot of eating and drinking and then when I got home I made a few fatal errors such as the Nutella downfall a few weeks ago. Last time I weighed myself I gained about 2 pounds since about a month ago. Not a huge amount gained, but I've been trying to lose weight for a year and have in fact gained a total of 6 pounds since last May. Now my clothes aren't fitting very well anymore and I just feel so big! I don't know how this can happen considering the frequency with which I exercise and the thought and effort I put into choosing and preparing my meals. This, along with other symptoms, has led to me believe I might have a hormonal imbalance or a related condition.

So I've made a doctor's appointment for Tuesday, actually hoping my practitioner finds something wrong. At least that would explain my difficulty maintaining my weight, being prone to depression, and my erratic cycle, among other things. If nothing comes up, then I just don't know what to do. Some people are prone to being heavier, yes, but everyone has the ability to maintain a healthy, attractive weight. Even if I'm meant to be on the "thick" side that's OK, but I shouldn't have so much body fat and my body should actually react to my weight loss efforts instead of being resistant to the point of seeing negative results.

Languages:

Last summer I studied French and German almost daily and I made time to read every day. As of this week I'm doing well if I read French for more than 20 minutes in a single week! I also haven't been going to conversation practices and I'm finding myself forgetting my vocabulary and any ability to speak French smoothly that I may have once had. This is devastating to me! I have GOT to make more time for this and take it more seriously. This is an area of my life that really is just because it's something I love- it's something just for me and something that helps me to be more social. Instead of letting work, errands and life exhaust me to the point that I skip language study everyday or every week, I need to make it a priority because it's good for me and makes me happy.

Friendships:

Similar to studying languages and reading, friendship is something you have to make time for. It takes time and effort. I have a handful of good friends and a lot of casual friends. In this way I'm very lucky as there's usually someone to chat with or send an email to just to see how life is going. As for the closer friendships though, I'm not doing such a good job. I don't let people get close to me very often and, as a result, they don't know how to read me very well and I don't always trust them like I should trust my friends. What's more, I don't always communicate my frustrations very well. Maybe it's fear of losing one of my very few actual close friends, so I keep things to myself until I just can't anymore. So I've been keeping people at a distance lately, just focusing on Leigh and Juneau Cat, and not really trying to build relationships as much. I don't know what to do about this because trust and friendship are not something you can just put on your "To Do" list. These are things that require a lifetime of experience to learn and negative past experiences can go a long way to effect future attempts at building relationships.

So yeah, I need to do better. I need to prioritize and be patient and diligent. In some ways I need to put myself first and in other ways I need to be better about focusing on other people in my life. Being a grown-up is so complicated!